I originally was writing an article called 101 things to be (not do).
But at number 59 I decided it was sounding highly pretentious and long winded.
In the spirit of KISS (keep it simple, stupid)… I’ve distilled it down into 25, following a creative challenge from a friend.
So… essential thoughts from a personal perspective. It’s not a manual, it’s an individual life view.
1. People change: humans are creatures of habit – they like to think that when things have gotten ‘just right’ that they will always stay that way. Unfortunately they don’t. In fact, the things you bank on being the most safe are often the things that suddenly change or disappear altogether. I know that I have changed over the last three years. Perhaps I’m a harsher person for it – and I know it has affected some friendships. But the one thing I have learned is this: I no longer am a walkover, and sometimes I’m going to be unpleasant because now, I will tell you if you’ve been a dick. Instead of staying silent and just thinking it. But otherwise, I’ll stick through things with those I trust through thick and thin.
2. A good friend will last longer than a lover ever will.
3. It’s okay to change your mind. Even at the last minute.. the last second.
4. I hate the western fashionista world. It’s full of heroin chic, size zero, air-brushed, stick insect women. Women should have curves and gratuitous, rounded mounds of flesh and not feel bad about it.
5. Sometimes I can’t make it. Sometimes I’ll fail. But I never intend to hurt those I let down… it’s just I had to work late, I had no money, or no time or something broke. Sometimes, just sometimes, I misunderstand a situation and will react negatively. If I was wrong – I will always apologise. I’m not too high and mighty to accept that I can, and do, make mistakes. One thing though: if I try and make amends as far as possible and that’s still not enough for you, I can, and often will, walk away. Permanently.
6. It’s ok to follow a dream. The best way to try and make it happen is to take a simple, active, first step towards it. So many people talk about it, but never put their foot where their mouth is.
7. I regularly plant my foot in my mouth.
8. Yes. Women have posh knickers and they have everyday knickers. But we’ll let you dream on.
9. I have this bizarre phenomenon that happens – it’s called the boomerang boyfriend effect. It’s happened more times than I care to mention.
10. One of the worst feelings ever is when two ex-boyfriends meet and discover they had the same girlfriend – namely you, and start comparing notes. In front of you. Including how you squeak at the height of.. uh, passion.
11. Why is smiling such a god damned crime? I mean people see you smiling and think you’ve got ‘one up’ on them or something. Or you want into their pants. Or you’re just a bit crazy. It ain’t necessarily so…
12. I hate silence.
13. What the hell is it with cinema cheese nachos dips? They smell like sulphurous tar pits. They taste much the same. People still eat this shit. I hate the stuff.
14. There is something awe inspiring in seeing an original first manuscript. I saw the original Jane Eyre last month. I was by turns fascinated and reverential.
15. ‘Truth’ is relative. What is true to one person is an outright lie to another. It depends on your worldview, your culture, your belief system, your perceptions. And people forget that.
16. Extremist organised religion scares the hell outta me: its streamlined, one size fits all, ask-no-questions concepts encourage people to obey and not to think. It’s a powerful tool to those who set the rules.
17. Making love is not fucking. Fucking is not making love. Got that?
18. Music is the one thing in the world I could not live without.
19. Insert well known fizzy pop drink…Max? Where’s the max? It has no sugar, it has no caffeine, it’s full of cancer inducing aspartamane. What the hell? What’s the point? I’ll say no thanks.
20. The opening line “I’m not racist, but…” always raises my hackles.
21. Anyone saying they have no regrets, is lying.
22. 70% cocoa chocolate melting slowly in the mouth is on a par with coming slowly.
23. In the face of danger, I will take a deep breath, focus, set my face to deadpan and keep on walking. Albeit at a much quickened pace. The less emotion you see, the more shit scared I will be.
24. I love all the things that are bad for me: coffee, chocolate, alcohol, men. But I still indulge.
25. I see Life as a series of desires, chasing those desires, making attempts, experiencing failures, learning from them, picking oneself up off the floor. But occasionally, I get it right. It’s worth it, and I’ll never, ever, give up.
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